What to Do When You Have a Girl Crush (For Women, Of Course)

As a public service, I have decided to write this.

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“Oh, my God! Cisi, you won’t believe who talked to me today?” My friend literally screamed at me, as though she was screaming at someone about to disembowel her. Such a fucking drama queen.

In a dry tone, and a forced smile threatening to tear my face into two unequal halves, I asked, “Who?” I might have hooted.

And that was how this friend of mine launched into a one-million-word spiel about a woman she met. Eventually, she asked, “Do you think she likes me? I like her lots.” Continue reading

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The Hustle of Studs, Stemmes, and Femmes (1): Femmes

(If you are reading this, I assume you know what these words – stud, stemme, and femme – mean.)

Being femme is not just about appearance, it is behavioural, too. Femmes embrace almost everything feminine as defined by patriarchy – all those heteronormative attributes: soft, gentle, sweet. A typical stud is easily drawn to femmes. Like moth and light. But there are buts, because some femmes do not want anything romantic to do with studs. They be like, “It would be too obvious that we are dating.”

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For Prejudiced People…

I had put this up on Facebook; however, after looking at it, I decided to put it here. (Chuckles) I have to put this meanness on record. I’m starting 2017 on a shady-ass note. Uh-hmmm… Here is for those prejudiced ass-fucking-holes. Those mo’fuckers that won’t stick their noses in their businesses.

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I was on my own, sipping vodka, and of course, minding my business when breeze blew someone from my past into my present o. (This Whatsapp is a problem.) Continue reading

A Dildo Can’t Do Some Things; Maybe That’s Why He Made Men.

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I read across somewhere: “Vibrators can’t lift heavy stuff and so, God decided to make men.” Something like that. When you give it critical thought, most of us, women, don’t need men.

It’s so comical when men think we actually need them. I think men are just misinformed on that particular issue. Very misinformed.

A typical man thinks he’s heaven’s gift to women. That is ludicrous and laughable. And when you “talk too much”, they say, “when you are single in your 40s…”

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Bisexuality and Belles

May 10, 2015…
I was thinking this morning. Why is it that women are now “digging” other women?
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Image gotten from houseofmo.com

On my first day at school, I met this dude in my class. He was cute! Fine dude. Tall. Lots of hair. Face hair melts my heart. I love dudes with hair! He had this macho thingy about him and I just wanted to do him. Yes. I would have done him if we had a room to ourselves. I’d just ride him across the milky way and back. Continue reading