Slandering Men (1): “Men are Whores”

You know that “logic/tactic” people use by insulting you before you insult them?

This explains why men call us whores when they haven’t even talked to us.

They are the real whores!

“Some Things Are Useful, Not Necessary.”

For laughs sake, I sent an article to BellaNaija titled I Want a Wife. Lord, the comments were amusing! Some people do not get sarcasm. Reading their comments, got me thinking…

After skimming through some heart-crushing, ego-ravaging comments, I had an internal monologue.

Ode to Lucifer

Photo Credit: http://www.pinterest.com

O, Lucifer, Prince of Darkness!

Many art the works of thine hands

That mortals have ignored through the aeons.

Wherefore art thou to claim thy works?

I shall speak for you, Prince of the Underworld!

 

‘On the seventh day,

Satan created ovulation cramps.

They were mildly painful but, t wasn’t enow mis’ry f’r the distaff folk.

And he mused, “what m’re shouldst I doth to amerce those folk f’r being so pow’rful?”*

The Mrs. Status

(This is the first chapter of the novel I am working on. It is still in the works. I hope you don’t get bored).

Chapter 1

IJE

The bedroom was dark. The March heat made the air in the room hot even with the curtains raised and the windows open. Ije lay in bed nude. As usual, there was no electricity to move the ceiling fan . She was thinking about many things. She had to hit the gym the next day; she just

Zuri

(This is a chapter from a book I’m working on. I hope
you like it. It was written from different women’s
experience. Any character’s semblance to real people
is coincidental. The story is set in South West Nigeria
between 2001 – 2003).

At her mother’s insistence, she had gone to spend the holidays at her uncle’s home in Osogbo. If only she’d known, she would have stayed back in Lagos.